Using a Resource Survey to set boundaries on giving.

A lesson I learned from my father growing up: Give what you have. From food to rides to dental care (my dad is a dentist) to a listening ear, I watched my parents give what they had. Years of being raised with this practice of giving what we had, means I’ve honed an ability to scan and respond when a need is presented. This “give what you have” mantra inspired my practice of making and hanging love notes in public places.

A useful tool in Show Up Hard is the Resource Survey, a prompt to examine what all we have to give and offer up to others when they need it. Our resources and ability to share those resources shift over time. As a social worker, giving is very often part of my professional work. I’ve found it helpful to update my Resource Survey from time to time. I’ve developed practices for helping teams and organizations to scan their available resources to understand, in advance of crisis, what resources are available to help staff and clients.

At an individual level, I notice people can struggle with over/under giving time and money. Is one of these the most tricky for you? What are all the things you have to give besides money? Besides time? Completing a Resource Survey for yourself can expand how you think about all that you have to give. Both time and money are incredibly valuable, and may be the answer in certain situations. There are also so many tangible and intangible things we have to give.

What do you have to give? Here is a text I sent to a colleague who was reconfiguring some boundaries around time and money. They worried about their value beyond these two offerings. I could see someone with so much more to offer.

Your:

Presence
Excellent listening skills
Ability to connect with people from a variety of backgrounds
Generous spirit
Kindness
Commitment to justice
Acceptance of people with different ways
Commitment to family
Strategy skills
Vision ability for immediate & future
Vast & diverse network
Knowledge
Wisdom
Willingness/will try

💓

Give what you have.

#ShowUpHard

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Getting ourselves unstuck from a story.